Holiday Carol: Good King Zuckerberg

Under: Humor

Sung to the tune of “Good King Wenceslas“

Good King Zuckerberg looked out
On his Facebook empire,
Winklevoss he just did rout,
Proving he’s no liar,
Lawsuits flanked his left and right
Threatening the young turk,
But his foes he did all smite,
Though he showed us he’s a jerk!

From the halls of Harvard he
Dropped out without fanfare,
Off to Silicon Valley,
Venture money to snare.
Making MySpace hit the skids,
He did with this platform,
Not only for teenage kids,
Sitting in their college dorm!

In the year two thousand twelve,
He went forth to NASDAQ,
Rang the bell and went to delve
For a handsome payback,
Sought out was his IPO,
Now we’re all in trouble,
Cause the stock price has gone low,
Social media bubble!

Now Marketers flock to use
Facebook for its pages,
“Friends” and “Likes” and “Going” to’s,
Posting for all ages,
Use it at work all day long
Though the boss not knowing
Now a billion users strong,
Keep your timeline flowing!

All day long we curse his name,
As we get nothing done
No one but ourselves to blame,
This is just the “new” fun,
He remains a billionaire,
And he is vindicted,
Hoarding money who knows where,
While we’re all addicted!